Tonight, I went to the launch for I am Second. If you do not know what I am Second is then I encourage all of you to visit their website. It is basically the power of impacting people through testimony and outreach. What I experienced tonight was so amazing. The Lord was so present and I feel like I need to be honest with all of you. I have been struggling throughout this whole year of where my faith is and my walk in faith and just overall being an example of Christ. And there have been times when I just have not been an example of Christ.
Recently, which opened my eyes to these struggles, my Best friend and I were talking about our passions. We have had countless conversations about anything and everything but this conversation was different. We were talking about deep down in our hearts what we absolutely love and what basically makes us wake up in the morning. So before I even said anything to him, I smiled real big and simply said mission. In the moment he looked confused so I began to explain that I am most happy when I am serving the Lord wholeheartedly and sharing his love with the world and his people. He looked back at me and said "you see thats where we differ." I was a little confused and then he proceeded to say, "I wasn't really raised that way and I have gone to church a couple of times but it has just been an awkward thing." and at that moment all I could say was "oh, I understand."
REALLY! thats all I could say.
The next day, I was overwhelmed. For as much faith as I "thought" I had, the Lord had thrown something at me and made me realize something very important.
When I struggle, I run away from what makes me happy. I run away to be apart of the easy life. I run to sin. Why are we so easily persuaded to just take the easy way out?
The past two weeks I have been deep in prayer and worship and self devotion with the Lord. The lord taught me this: He has given me these friends to be apart of their life but most importantly He has given me these friends to be an example through Christ for them, not to take the easy way and just conform to them. I was letting sin come into my life by conforming to their ways and when I had that conversation with my BEST friend and we had never talked about our passions and our faith, the Lord stopped me in my footsteps and turned me the other way. He threw it in my face that I am there to share with them my testimony, to share with them my happiness and be a light for them.
So tonight when I was listening to these speakers with I am second, it made me realize how much of life I had been putting before the Lord. He put us all here for a purpose and that was to be a radical disciple for him and to share his love with others and most importantly to put him first.
So I am following my passion, I am going to Africa because that is what the Lord has put me here for and that is to be a missionary for him. I have never been so sure of my purpose. No matter where I am, if I am home with family, out with friend, or with the children in Mombasa, I know the Lord wants me to live to serve him.
I am Jenny. and I am second.
With Love,
Jenny
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